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Archive for July, 2010

Leighton is 9 months old!

Sweet Leighton!  I truly know that I sound like a broken record…but, I CANNOT believe you are 9 months old!  You have changed so much in the last 4 weeks.  You are standing, really well, all on your own.  You took one tiny scoot of a step yesterday reaching for grandad.  You crawl around the house like a pro…pulling up to a standing position at any chance:).  You have 2 bottom  teeth and one at the top. The eating situation has gotten a tiny bit better…You really only want table food.

You still smile ALL THE TIME!  It is truly precious… we can’t go anywhere without people commenting on how happy you are.  You have a very sweet disposition!  You obey really well when you are told “No No”.   You love to watch Carter and Caroline play/wrestle/fight…and when I have to take you to bed you reach back towards the door…wanting to be where they are.  You LOVE the water…bath time and playing in the pool!

So much of your personality has started shining through…you love to cuddle…you like to laugh and dance…and you enjoy being outside!  Precious little girl…you are so dear to our family!

You always have your tongue sticking out:)

 

Standing all by yourself…mommy is NOT ready for you to walk yet!

 

Precious sleeping baby…

Bathing beauty…

 

 

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4th of July Recap

As usual our 4th of July consists of lots of family and lots of food!  16 of us slept in the same house for 3 days and had a ball.  All of the cousins have the time of their lives!

I had a lot of little baby-sitters!

 

The kids faces are always priceless!

Leighton loved the fire works…she wasn’t scared at all!

 

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Lessons of Parenting

As I was sitting in the waiting room of a doctor’s office today I picked up a magazine to browse through, before long I was all misty eyed. I LOVE all 10 of these…and truly hope to remember to implement them in my life.

 The article was titled, “10 lessons of parenting from one wise guy who’s DONE doing the dad thing“.  He is sitting in a coffee shop…has just dropped his last child off at college…and he starts to think, “How did I do as a parent?”

He states, “Overall I think I was a SUPER dad, but if I could turn back time, here are 10 things I would have done differently, more or less.”

1.  I would have packed the car more often

“Somehow, when you’re lifted out of your normal habitat, dropped into an unfamiliar place where nobody knows who you are, you see your family with fresh eyes.  No passports or planning or piles of money required.  Just go.  Three days hiking, staying the night at a hotel, sitting on the beach.  Just go. ” 

2.  Explain things less

“They’d come home from school with a problem and I’d explain it away rather than really hearing it, understanding their anxiety.  Bad plan.  I’d sympathize more, manage reality less.  That way they might confide in me more NOW without fear of being talked OUT of their feelings.”

3.  I would have raised my voice less

“We become most upset with out children when we see in them aspects of our own personalities of which we disapprove”.  

( I think we would all agree:(…enough said)

4.  I would have put up the hoop sooner

“Basically, find common ground with your kids. This could be anything the 2 of you enjoy doing together…fishing, basketball, cooking.  So that when your child is a teenager and doesn’t feel like “communicating” with you as much anymore…you still have that thing you enjoy doing together…even if no words are spoken!”

5.  I would have hung around more at bedtime

“The 10 minutes before the kids go to sleep are often gold.  They start to talk about things that aren’t spoken of at other times of the day…revelations start to float to the surface and you get a glimpse into their little minds.  Don’t run back to the TV to watch the end of the baseball game…hang around and see if you can’t catch a flash of something !”

6.  I would have bought more hamsters

“My daughter had a love for hamsters over a period of 3-4 years…the sense memories  will always summon Dad for daughter, daughter for Dad.  I wish I would have shared more stuff with my kids- golf, hunting, baseball, coin-collecting-anything that has the gear to shape remembrance.”

7.  I would have invested the first five minutes more

“Often, at the end of the day, I was tired…frazzled…too-short attention span, I didn’t always engage with my kids in whatever.  If I could turn back time, I’d try to think about the past more and the future a little less.”

8.  I would have been more patient with fantasy

His son was more interested in elves, wizards and comic books than sports…he felt like, “my failure to embrace those elves must have seemed like a reproach.”  “Take an interest in what your kids enjoy…there are a million paths to adulthood.”

9.  I  would have touched them more

“Sure you touch your kids a lot when they are little…wrestling, tickling, cuddling, sleeping together. But as they got older, I got less touchy.  Fourteen year olds don’t enjoy the same things they did a few years before.   I felt marginalized by their teenage disinterest in me..I was giving them their space.  Now I realize that human touch trumps the language of esteem-building. ”

10.  I would have been alone with each of my kids more often

” I spent a lot of time with my children…together.  I wonder if being always together didn’t keep me from hearing the unique sound of my boy and my girl.  We had lots of laughs as a group, but I wish I would of institutionalized some just-the-two-of-us traditions with each of them.  I might have heard their solo voice a touch more clearly and they might have understood the particularity of my love for them.”

So there you have it…something to ponder on the next few days.  I would love to hear your thoughts about this…or any special way you try to implement some of these things.  I don’t want to drop Leighton off at college…go to a local coffee shop to think…and wish I had done things differently.  Oh I know I will make PLENTY of mistakes I just want to REALLY try to make the most of these few fleeting years that I have the kiddos at home!

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